Dave
I don’t think people are saying it’s a choice; what they’re saying is that it’s a condition rather than an identity. Most conservatives I know view trans in the same way that they view anorexia. We don’t hate anorexic people or view them as any less human. Rather, we view them as people stricken by a condition that has harmed their quality of life. If someone who’s 90 pounds and anorexic insists that they’re fat, we won’t play along with that delusion. But that doesn’t mean we hate the person. Not in the slightest. What we would hate, however, is if a doctor or media organization came out and said “If this 90 pound person says she’s fat, then she is, and you must support her getting bariatric surgery.” That’s where we draw the line. But it’s important to recognize that just because someone rejects the notion that a man can be a woman does NOT mean they’re rejecting that person as a human being.